Only in California…Parents May Soon Be Able To Sue Social Media Platforms for Their Childs Online Addiction

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It’s no fault of the rabbit if a child gets sick from eating too much Easter candy. It means the child was left alone to their own devices to determine when enough was enough and they paid the price for their lack of mature logic. So who’s fault would this be? The blame falls smack dab on the adult who was responsible for the child’s well-being.

A child pushing themselves to the brink of chocolate euphoria is not a serious offense, of course, but any lack of proper adult supervision can lead to children developing unwanted and sometimes dangerous habits.

Only in California would adults blame social media platforms for their children spending too much time posting selfies and scrolling, when just as with the Easter candy, they’re being left to their own devices. Chances are, if an adult leaves the house, they will return home to find their child(ren) in the exact same spot with the exact same cell phone in their hand, their index finger performing a non-stop swiping motion. 

Since child-rearing failures in California are never the fault of those who, in actuality, should bear full responsibility, the grown-ups who can’t control their children’s online activity are going after social media platforms, pretty much just for being in business.

If parents get their way, they’ll soon be able to hold platforms like Facebook, TikTok, and Instagram, fully responsible for turning their youngsters into glazed-eyed robots with no direction in life.

A new bill has already passed through the state Assembly that’ll allow parents to file a lawsuit against social media platforms for up to $25,000 for every time they can’t pry the phone out of their child’s hand. So if you have a passel of kids and wanna make some extra Jack, head west and snag an internet connection.

Concerned parents say their children are “addicted.” The bill applies to anyone under the age of 18 who has suffered mentally, physically, materially, developmentally, or emotionally, as a result of their online activity. The term “addicted” is widely defined enough to include the Bubonic Plague. And don’t be surprised…

But there’s a catch to all of this. Just as in the case of an alcoholic or a drug addict, the first step to social media addiction recovery is in getting a kid, any kid, to admit they have a problem, and good luck with that. They have to openly admit that they need and want help. Coercion and bribery will surely see a dramatic rise in numbers.

The bill doesn’t specify which social media platforms it’s gunning for, but the obviousness of it only applying to platforms that grossed at least $100 million last year leaves no further questions. 

The author of the bill, Assemblymember Jordan Cunningham, a liberal Republican with the soul of a Democrat…Hey…it’s California…, made this bizarre statement, “The era of unfettered social experimentation on children is over and we will protect kids.”   

Interesting term. “Social experimentation.” Cunningham must have borrowed it from the Third Reich. 

The bill is on its way to the California state Senate where they’ll spend an entire week kicking it around. If it gets passed into law, it’ll let a lot of parents off the hook for not being able or willing to control their own children. If it doesn’t, the blame will all resort back to where it should.